Own your sexuality, release the shame, and step into unstoppable sexual confidence.

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Hey, I’m Kevin (he/him).

I’m a Gay Sex Coach with over 10 years of experience helping men go from sexually ashamed to sexually empowered.

I hold a Master of Science in Psychology and certifications as a Health Coach, Behavior Change Specialist, and Personal Trainer.

Beyond coaching, I actively engage in sexual empowerment spaces through my popular Substack, BlueSky profile, OnlyFans, and JustForFans pages.

Why me?


I used to be just like you — afraid of sex, ashamed of my body, punishing myself for feeling desire. I even put myself in unsafe situations because I thought that’s all I deserved.

This led to a tainted relationship with myself — body tremors that would shake the house any time I would try to have sex, sexual panic attacks, and loneliness from others and from myself. I didn’t want to be here any more.

When I began exploring my sexual history, sexual shame, and safely reintroduced gentle sexual experiences back into my life, everything changed.

I created a process for this safe sexual exploration, starting with exploring one’s sexual past, leading them through a human-based approach of sexual excitement and showing them how to create safe spaces for themselves.

It’s helped over 1,000 gay men around the world become connected to themselves and their partners like never before, and it’ll do the same for you.

This is a process rooted in love, compassion, encouragement, and transformation.

Who’s this for?

This is for gay men who feel completely disconnected from their sexuality.

  • Gay men afraid to admit they are gay.

  • Gay men who believe they are too ugly to be sexually desired.

  • Gay men who haven’t had sex in 10 years.

  • Gay men who’ve never had sex.

  • Gay men who haven’t come out.

  • Gay men who just came out and lost everything.

  • Gay men who want to be sexual but are too afraid to do so.

  • Gay men who arrive at their hookup and leave before knocking on the door.

  • Gay men who punish themselves for masturbating because it’s “against God’s will.”

  • Gay men who hookup in unsafe situations because they believe that’s all they’re worth.

  • You.

What’s my process?

As the expert in the process, I lead clients through a structured approach of sessions, each with a different topic and focus. And even though my process is structured, I individualize it to each client, their story, and their needs.

First, we’ll meet for an initial consultation to make sure you feel safe with me. I’ll learn a bit more about your story, and I’ll create a plan just for you.

Once we agree on this plan, it’s game time.

We start by exploring your presenting challenges and concerns in great depth.

We’ll then explore what’s connected to them (what experiences you’ve been through that have impacted where you currently are).

Next, we’ll explore the messages you’ve learned along the way (the shaming, negative, unhelpful, thoughts you think about yourself and your sexuality). We’ll identify where they come from.

Then, the shift begins. We’ll start replacing those unhelpful messages with helpful ones — ones that serve you and where you want to be going.

As you incorporate these messages, letting go of the old ones, we’ll explore your genuine self — what turns you on? What excites you? What sets your body ablaze and your heart aflame?

We’ll begin creating opportunities for you to start exploring those experiences, slowly and as you are ready. We’ll debrief them along the way, so you can feel yourself grow.

Lastly, when it’s time, we’ll review your new sexually-explored self, taking a look back at all you’ve grown through and where you’re at now. We’ll create a plan for moving forward, and you’ll be ready to fully dive into your newfound sexual self.

Most clients complete this process in 6-8 sessions.

My ground rules:

I require sessions to be scheduled no more than 2 weeks apart.

It’s important that we continue with consistency and intention to ensure your growth throughout the process.

You’ll receive homework in-between each session.

Each session is $200 and 60 minutes.

We’ll be able to text and email in-between sessions for follow-up support.

I only work with 10 clients at a time to ensure appropriate care and attention of each individual.

Clothes stay on during sessions as this is a talk conversation-based process, but all topics are fair game. Seriously. Let’s get dirty.

Some areas we commonly explore:

  • Your initial sexual experiences

  • Your sexual story

  • Your sexual fears

  • Barriers impacting your sexual confidence

  • Your sexual ethics

  • Your sexual beliefs

  • Your sexual interests, wants, and desires

  • Your sexual boundaries

If this resonates, let’s talk.

About Kevin

Hey, I’m Kevin Martin (he/him).

I’m a Gay Sex Coach, and I help gay men work through sexual shame by releasing shameful messages and patterns, exploring positive self-talk, and learning new skills to support their sexual confidence.

I used to be full of sexual shame. I hated myself for being gay, and as a result, I punished myself by entering into unsafe sexual situations and staying in unhealthy intimate relationships. Once I discovered my worth and my value, I learned tools to help me let go of that sexual shame in replacement of radical sexual empowerment.

And as a result, I started my coaching practice, SafeHaus Wellness Services, to ensure gay men have a safe, supportive, empowering home for their sexual health, growth, and development, taking all I’ve learned from my personal and professional experiences to help gay men transform their lives.

Over the past 10 years, I’ve helped more than 1,000 gay men recalibrate their relationships with themselves by letting go of sexual shame and embracing sexual empowerment.

I have my Masters of Science in Psychology and am a Certified Health Coach, Certified Behavior Change Specialist, and Certified Personal Trainer. I utilize all of these backgrounds (plus my clinical mental health professional experience) to ensure gay men are receiving the loving, caring, tender support they need.

Listen to fellow gays:

“Kevin’s innate gentle nature combines with passion and dedication in a powerful and magical way for those wishing to learn to experience greater peace, love, and self-acceptance to live more fulfilled and happier lives.”

— Client Review

“Kevin leads first and foremost with empathy, modeling how we can approach ourselves and partners with kindness and grace. I can’t overstate how much he opened my eyes, mind, and heart to the power of radical self-acceptance which improved how I approach trauma.”

— Client Review

“Just a quick note to say thank you! I fucking LOVE being queer, non-monogamous and now a sex worker!!! And I have you to thank for my confidence and for feelingso embodied and empowered to try new things like this.”

— Current client

“I’ve had several sessions with Kevin and have found him to be one the most compassionate and empathetic listeners I’ve met. Kevin truly takes pride in his work and listens to understand while also asking thought-provoking questions without judgement.”

— Client Review

“You have honestly saved my life. I've always struggled with who I am. When we started, I had hardly any confidence in myself. I didn't think I was worth anything, and your mentorship has truly changed me. You've taught me that I'm not a mistake.”

— Client Review

“You have honestly saved my life. I've always struggled with who I am. When we started, I had hardly any confidence in myself. I didn't think I was worth anything, and your mentorship has truly changed me. You've taught me that I'm not a mistake.”

— Current client

“This has been such an empowering time. I've learned how to accept myself without apology, and I'm finally stepping into my body without judging it. I love my gay self!! I love being sexy!!”

— Current client

Additional Resources

  • Gay Sex Coaching on Substack is your unapologetic, empowering guide for gay men ready to burn down shame, reclaim their sexual power, and own their desires with fierce confidence.

  • Listen to The SafeHaus Podcast anywhere podcasts are found!

  • Tamara Driskell, LMHC — one of the most fiery humans I know (and my personal coach).

    Eric Santamaria — absolutely badass anti-burnout coach

    Dr. Michael Simmons — incredible shadow work coach

  • SHAMELESS: The Gay Man’s Masterclass in Confidence, Empowerment & Desire is a fiery, no-apologies on-demand coaching course for gay men ready to smash sexual shame, unleash their rawest desires, and stand fully in their power.

    It’s your bold roadmap to becoming the confident, magnetic, and unstoppable sexual force you were always meant to be.

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